dukes
This weekend The Dukes of Hazzard movie hits theaters nationwide. And, it's not without some minor controversy. Former Dukes cast member, Ben "Cooter" Jones recently spoke out against the new movie, strongly recommending "that true blue Dukes fans hold their noses and pass this one up."
And, recently I heard of a boycott from a very hardcore The Dukes of Hazzard fan: my brother, Tater.
In a LLR exclusive, we spoke with Tater over the phone:
I hear you're not seeing the Dukes of Hazzard movie?
I will.
Wait. What? Mom said you weren't going to go see it.
I wasn't but I decided that I gotta go see it. I mean it looks kinda gay.
Gotta see it for the car, you know?
Wow. You're taking this all better than I thought you would.
It's kinda like those episodes when they didn't have Bo and Luke and they had those two dumb-ass cousins Coy and Vance. They're still the Dukes, but I kinda just put them out of my mind and pretend they don't exist. Same with the movie. It's not really the show, but I gotta go see it anyway.
What about Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke?
They could've got better. She'll do. She has blonde hair. Daisy doesn't have blonde hair, she has black.
Yeah, but she's got back. She's wearing the shorts.
The shorts do look good. (He mumbles and says something, which I'm pretty sure was nasty)
So, you aren't taking Cooter's warning and boycotting the movie?
Naw. I'm still a Dukes of Hazzard fan. I can kinda see where he's coming from. I haven't seen much about it, just a few previews...looks hokey though. They got some scene where they're running around a college and being all fucking stupid. At least it has the car.
What about the new Duke boys?
Oh...um...Johnny Fucknut? And...um... What's his name? Stiffler? I don't know. They're gonna be different. That's all I know.
Anything else we should know?
I'm bringing whiskey with me. If it gets hokey I can drink and still have fun.
Whiskey? How are you smuggling that in? In your tummy?
Naw, man. I got a girlfriend with big ass purse.
Thanks, Tater for this interview.
Yeah.
And, recently I heard of a boycott from a very hardcore The Dukes of Hazzard fan: my brother, Tater.
In a LLR exclusive, we spoke with Tater over the phone:
I hear you're not seeing the Dukes of Hazzard movie?
I will.
Wait. What? Mom said you weren't going to go see it.
I wasn't but I decided that I gotta go see it. I mean it looks kinda gay.
Gotta see it for the car, you know?
Wow. You're taking this all better than I thought you would.
It's kinda like those episodes when they didn't have Bo and Luke and they had those two dumb-ass cousins Coy and Vance. They're still the Dukes, but I kinda just put them out of my mind and pretend they don't exist. Same with the movie. It's not really the show, but I gotta go see it anyway.
What about Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke?
They could've got better. She'll do. She has blonde hair. Daisy doesn't have blonde hair, she has black.
Yeah, but she's got back. She's wearing the shorts.
The shorts do look good. (He mumbles and says something, which I'm pretty sure was nasty)
So, you aren't taking Cooter's warning and boycotting the movie?
Naw. I'm still a Dukes of Hazzard fan. I can kinda see where he's coming from. I haven't seen much about it, just a few previews...looks hokey though. They got some scene where they're running around a college and being all fucking stupid. At least it has the car.
What about the new Duke boys?
Oh...um...Johnny Fucknut? And...um... What's his name? Stiffler? I don't know. They're gonna be different. That's all I know.
Anything else we should know?
I'm bringing whiskey with me. If it gets hokey I can drink and still have fun.
Whiskey? How are you smuggling that in? In your tummy?
Naw, man. I got a girlfriend with big ass purse.
Thanks, Tater for this interview.
Yeah.
8 Comments:
Anyone who smuggles whiskey into the movie theater is okay in my book! Gett'er done, Tater!
Oh damn! Seeing that photo and this interview is getting me so excited for the golf tourney.
Get'er Done!
Damn fine movie!
Yeah, Tater was mostly "what the fuck is this all about?" when i called him.
It goes without saying, there were a lot of 'Taterisms' that we had to leave out.
Dude, your bro kicks ass.
I think the key to anyone's greatness lies in their willingness to wear a shirt with their own name printed on the front. For example, I have a friend named Dennis who has a shirt that says nothing but "Dennis" on it in huge letters, and I've noticed that when he wears it out he's at least 3 to 4 times funnier than normal.
I miss Tater. I miss JL. We're hosting Dance-Splosion this Friday night, why don't you get a wild hair up your ass and come home. I'll buy you a drink. Maybe even two.
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